Mr. Wow Blog
Mr. wOw Contemplates 2011, with Wary Resolve
3:01 pm | January 5, 2011

Author: Mr. Wow | Category: Point of View | Comments: 64

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(And, what he did while laid up with a monster cold.)

And so it’s here, the New Year. Feh. See, right off I have the wrong attitude!

But seriously. Over the past two years, my association with wowOwow and all of you has given me more pleasure and incentive than I could have imagined, or have enjoyed for some years. If you knew Mr. wOw, his life and “career,” you’d say of his appearances on this website: “Oh, Mr. wOw, you’ve gotten yourself into another self-defeating pickle!” And there is some truth in that. But at this point I’ll take any pickle that comes my way.

For your New Year, I wish you health, most of all. Without that — forget it. Second, if not wealth, then reasonable, comforting financial security. Without that, you can’t maintain your health. Or quite a few other things. And I wish those same things for those you love.

As for me, I resolve what I have resolved every year for the past, well … more than I care to count. I want to work harder to lift myself out of depression, which still burdens me (and those around me.) I wish to be the person I once was: more active, more involved, less self-isolated, less tentative. I can still be the old me, but it doesn’t last long. I must remind myself that though I turn 58 next week, I am still a young man. (Certainly if I dropped dead at this computer, they’d say that: “Oh, so young!”)

In still being young (ish) there can be a second act in my life. Especially as I don’t think the curtain ever really came up on the first act. (My life as been like a long out of town show: constantly tweaked and never ready for Broadway.)

I resolve to see friends more often and not let those I friendships I cherish wither.

I resolve to be more thoughtful, less anxious, aware every day that life is short, and I am wasting time.

I resolve to be forceful and confident, should my job of many years end. I resolve not to recall the opportunities I passed up because of fear and insecurity, but to make new opportunities for myself.

I resolve to do all this for B., who suffers when I suffer and who has his own problems. I know, I know, the therapists always say “You have to do it for yourself.”  Well, that’s fine. When I feel better about myself, maybe that will happen. At the moment, I want to do it for B. I have failed every recent year in this area, and I hope so much that I can get over myself, and move ahead. It’s hard to hurt the one you love. No, wait. It’s easy to hurt the one you love. It’s hard to accept that you do.

I’ll keep you posted on what must be baby steps at this point. Leaping is out of the question.

* * *

And now for something lighter. Mr. wOw has been suffering a hellish cold, which only now seems to be abating. My colds are pretty bad anyway (or have become so over the past decade, with terrible sinus issues), but this one totally knocked me flat. My vacation has been spent mostly in bed. Okay, that’s not too “light” — but it is only a cold. And it had the advantage of deepening my voice dramatically. I was kind of hoping when I stopping sneezing and coughing and feeling my face would explode from the sinus pain, that the manly voice would linger — forever. Alas, as always, when the cold goes, so goes the butch.

Feeling crappy, with a shorter attention span than usual, Mr. wOw channel-surfed relentlessly and occasionally lurched to my computer, to see what was happening.

I watched all of the Turner Classic Movies special on the Disney Studio transition from animation to live action movies. It brought back a flood of wonderful memories. I saw all those films — “Old Yeller,” “Swiss Family Robinson,” “20,000 Leagues Under the Sea,” “Pollyanna,” “The Parent Trap,” and so many more — and usually at drive-ins, which I thought were so exciting and glamorous! It was a big adventure, going to the drive-in. I was very happy that night.

Otherwise, everything was kind of an annoying blur, one way or another — lots and lots and lots of Sarah Palin on Fox: with Greta, with Hannity, with Greta, with O’Reilly, with Greta and more Greta. (Forget Oprah and Gayle – -Greta and Sarah are super-duper BFF’s.) To one of her Fox friends, she declared that liberal women could not be “Mama Grizzlies” and that women who called themselves feminists weren’t really, because they expected the government and men to take care of them. Her logic, if one may call it that, is confounding.  So, anyway, liberal women are lousy mothers. Thought some of you ladies might like to know that.

Also on Fox: the pathetic Tucker Carslon declaring that Michael Vick should be “executed” for his dog-fighting crimes (for which Vick paid the price.) Tucker, though he is a floundering man desperate for attention, was probably serious. As for me, I think Vick did his time, and let the man get on with his life. People who commit murder on human beings are forgiven more easily than Vick. And I am saying this as somebody who weeps every time one of those ASPCA commercials come on about the abused animals — a new one has “Blondie, abandoned and dying of a broken heart.” At that point I’m sobbing. And no, I don’t Obama think should have weighed in on any aspect of it.

Then there was Aston Kutcher, talking about how he’s preparing for the End of Times. I did not realize he (and Demi, apparently) were so nutty. If he’s looking for signs of the Apocalypse, he need look no further than the fact he has a movie career.

Rupert Everett, playing the same old song about how he wishes he hadn’t come out — it ruined his career and he wouldn’t advise anybody else to come out. Honey, maybe you just weren’t leading man material. Too late now. Enough! He also dragged Jennifer Aniston into his dirge: she makes all these flops but still works all the time. So? Bitter man. (Richard Chamberlain, who waited many years to come out, said pretty much the same thing — he wouldn’t that recommend actors who wish to be romantic leads come out. But he’s not all bent out shape about it.)

Listen, Neil Patrick Harris seems to be doing pretty good. The times, they have ‘a changed. But as with everything, nothing changes quickly. Racism and misogyny anyone?

So nice to see that Judith Miller –”Bloody Judy” as I call her — has a new job aside from her commentating duties on Fox News. Miller, whose inaccurate New York Times stories led the push to war in Iraq, is writing for Newmax, a conservative magazine and online site. Good luck, Judy! Maybe you can incite another war and have the blood of thousands more young Americans on your hands.

I read The Butcher’s Tale, a true story about a youth who was murdered in a small German town in 1900, and how the Jews of the community were accused and persecuted for indulging in “ritual murder.” Author Helmut Walsh Smith offers an intense, horrifying glimpse of the seeds of Hitler’s “Final Solution” forty years later. If you want to understand, at least partially, “how could this happen,” read this book.

And, I also devoured Kitty Kelley’s The Royals, which is out in paperback. I missed this evisceration of the House of Windsor in hardcover. (I make no excuses. I would have read it even if I hadn’t been sick.) Read The Royals and you’ll want to rush to England, join any group that opposes the monarchy, and do your damndest to pull it down — they are the Borgias, minus the poisonings. This didn’t surprise me, since I’m no fan of royalty — except, that is, for the late drama queen Diana, who was so exquisitely, neurotically rebellious.

And, I confess, I did watch a lot of gory horror movies and cheesy murder and conspiracy mysteries on my 500 cable channels. Violent bad cinema can sometimes soothe. Or maybe it was just the effects of Nyquil.

Comments:
  • Deirdre Cerasa

    Mr.WoW,  My day is made!!!!  I have missed your notes and musings these past couple of weeks (felt like months).  I look forward to what juicy stuff you bring us.  I mean it with all my heart.  I pray you will find some way to take some steps up from depression.  As for your cold, I think I am one of the few on the East Coast who skipped the lovely thing and I am so happy I did.  Why is it that when you have time or are confined, there is nothing on any of our 500 channels.  Anyhoo, as I go on, I wish you and B a lovely, happy, healthy New Year.

    3:39 pm | January 3, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear Deirdre…thank you.  I’m sure once this cold is done with, I’ll feel more like tackling my resolutions.

      4:42 pm | January 3, 2011
  • Baby Snooks

    I always resolve not to gossip in the New Year.  I guess I need to resolve not to answer the phone. Which this year rang not too long after the sun rose.  I actually didn’t gossip with the caller who called to tell me someone had died. I really didn’t care to hear that they died. But did inform the caller that I hoped she rotted in hell along with the deceased and hung up. Then I called. And emailed. And gossiped.  One of those personal “schadenfreude” thingys. 

    Michael Vick. Have you seen photos of the “surviving” dogs?  Don’t know that I would execute him. I would have, however, put him in a cage with the “surviving” dogs.  I don’t really like the PETA people. And I really don’t like Barack Obama. I haven’t liked him for some time.  I like him even less now. Has to do with the photos of the “surviving” dogs. Someone who would do that to an animal is beyond rehabilitiation, dear, and beyond redemption. 

    Rupert Everett has a point. About career. And about Jennifer Aniston. As for Richard Chamberlain he suffers from Rock Hudson Delusional Syndrome.  Women swooned. Women also knew. Women always know. Even when they’re swooning. 
    Kitty Kelley seemed, well, a little reserved with The Royals for some reason. Lots of gossip not in the book. Surely she heard the gossip. But didn’t print it.  Curious.

    The Nazis. Then. Now. Things never change. The Bushes. Then. Now. Things never change. 

    My New Year’s “wish” this year was short and sweet.  A toast many years ago by a larcenous little leprechaun from Ireland.  May what you see in others delight you and may what others see in you delight them this coming year. I hope he rots in hell as well if he isn’t already. 

    3:41 pm | January 3, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear Baby…don’t resolve not to gossip.  That one never works out.

      Yes, Rupert has a point.  But his boat sailed, perhaps because he doesn’t have the chops.  Or because he’s British and they all seem gay anyway.  And yes, he has a point about Aniston, but…his point is?  Obviously, she satisfies studios in some way, perhaps in DVD rentals? 

      I’ve seen the surviving dogs.  As part of his punishment, Vick can never own another dog.  He’ll have to work out  his sadistic tendencies elsewhere.  Chapter Two upcoming.

      Kitty is always “a little reserved.”  She never tells all.  She can’t.  Those stories would have her in court.   Still, it was an amusing two days of reading.

      4:52 pm | January 3, 2011
      • Briana Baran

        I don’t watch Jennifer Anniston movies (except Office Space, which happened to include her), because her sort of entertainment alternately makes me want to squirm with embarrassment, or be sick on myself. However, she is essentially harmless, and much of the attraction, as I understand from men, is that she is pretty, unaffected, and less a “legend in her own mind” as the subject of a great deal of ridiculous hoopla in the media’s always unpleasant need to create drama and angst.
         
        Ms. Jolie, her regular detractor, is the greater mystery for me. Her movies can reek of week-old roadkill, and yet she receives accolades from millions of viewers. According to the polls, the majority of these are women. As a woman with reasonably open eyes, and a fair tolerance of human nature, the Angelina-worship by females is inexplicable.
         
        Michael Vick isn’t being punished by being prevented from owning a dog, and I feel no sympathy for him. I detest PETA, because they are just as violent as Mr. Vick, and hypocrites of the highest order. The irony is that most men, having committed such crimes, and having paid their dues, would be unlikely to be allowed to return to their former level of employment and enjoy anywhere near their previous lifestyles. They would be forever branded as a “ex-convicts”. But Michael Vick is making millions. He has never said that he was sorry for the abuse, cruelty and deliberate torture he inflicted on his dogs, or apologized for his behavior. Ah, the celebutard life…

        7:21 am | January 4, 2011
        • Mr. Wow

          Dear Briana…Actually, Michael Vick has apologized and has even given speeches in various places about how he’s learned his lesson re animal cruelty.  Sincere?  I have my doubts. But it’s not a crime to be insincere.  ”Most men” who abuse animals are not world famous, wealthy athletes to begin with.  They go back to their old life.  Mr. Vick went back to his. 

          Happy New Year!

          I can’t help it, I still like Miss Aniston.

          12:13 pm | January 4, 2011
          • Briana Baran

            As a person, I admire Jennifer Aniston, because she lives her life in a fashion pleasing to herself, vacations where she wants desires, actually reads on vacation (in lieu of feeding her nose, nailing everything in sight, and being photographed sans underwear, and gracelessly face-planting while staggeringly drunk). I think that she is deserving of a decent relationship with an equally decent human being.
             
            I just loathe romances, particularly romantic comedies, and heart-jerkers such as Marley & Me. Two of my favorite movies are Alien and Pulp Fiction, followed by 30 Days of Night. Although I always seem to cry during Bladerunner, another film dear to my heart, when Roy Batty says, “Time to die”, and closes his eyes. Perhaps this explains my antipathy for Ms. Aniston’s body of work.
             
            Most men who are convicted of a felony do not go back to their old way of life. Michael Vick has. Had he not been convicted, his “issues” would have been made a tiny blip on the media radar screen so that he could continue to play. He got caught, and tried, and convicted…and he’s resting on his laurels as if nothing happened. I was not aware that he had apologized, as I stopped following his appearances as soon as I found out that the Eagles had hired him…and that was definitely before any gratuitous “I’m sorries” were drooled from between his lips. Easy to do whatever is asked of you when you’re back to making millions.
             
            I am patiently waiting to see if Ben Roethlisberger will fail to listen to his handlers, and will slip his chain long enough to really result in serious consequences. We aren’t talking about dogs in his case (which, after all, are merely considered to be property in this country). Chattel law is technically absent in the USA. We’ll see what happens.
             
            Happy New Year to you as well!

            7:50 am | January 6, 2011
  • Haunted Lady
    HauntedLady

    Glad to see you’re back and feeling a bit better. Ah, the miracles wrought by wonton soup!
    I stopped making New Year’s resolutions many years ago. I usually gave in because I wasn’t yet committed to making the needed change, and making the resolutions almost always involved copious amounts of alcohol. If I’m going to change something, I’ll change it when I feel I will do it and am quite sober.
    Poor Rupert. It’s not likely he would win this whether out or not. Neil Patrick Harris and Adam Lambert so far seem to be doing just fine. I truly hope it’s the beginning of a new attitude.
    TCM had a Cary Grant marathon which warmed the dark corners of my little mind. Arsenic and Old Lace, Penny Serenade, My Favorite Wife and on and on. Added to the 4 books I read, it was a lovely time.
    Whether you do something for yourself or for B or both, the important thing is the doing. And remember that a lot of people out here are pulling for you.
     

    4:21 pm | January 3, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear Haunted Lady…”Arsenic and Old Lace”  That played so often on TV when I was  a kid, I knew it by heart.  Still love it.

      7:13 pm | January 3, 2011
  • lsmyers

    Glad you are feeling better and back Mr. WoW! Weather reports from New York didn’t seem to give much desire for outdoors anyway, good time to have an excuse to hibernate and get over a cold. My resolutions for 2011, just to take it a day at a time without projecting my life out too far into the year, might miss something in the process. May all your wishes come true in 2011.

    5:31 pm | January 3, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear Linda…all my wishes?  I don’t think so.  I would be–as Norma Desmond famously said–”Too happy to go on with the scene!”

      7:15 pm | January 3, 2011
  • Well, I don’t much care for Vick or his thuggish idea of fun, but I agree with you that when someone has done their time, we are supposed to let them move on.  If we don’t want to let them move on, then we should have had a justice system that would sentence them to life without parole.
     
    But letting an ex-con move on with his life also doesn’t mean turning a totally blind eye to his past.  Vick may never break another law, but statistically… many do.  And a guy who thinks mutilating live animals is fun, is not someone I want as a friend, neighbor or employee.

    5:55 pm | January 3, 2011
    • Mary

      I could barely contain my huge sigh yesterday when our news station here in Ohio announced the fireing of the head coach of the Cleveland Browns and suggested that Vick may be a contender?  Yikes!

      12:20 pm | January 4, 2011
  • Baby Snooks

    The depression. Try the piece of Godiva. If that doesn’t work, try some music that reminds you of better times. For me, possibly for you, a little samba music. And off to Rio we go.  “So danco samba, so danco samba, vai, vai, vai, vai, vai….” Carnaval. Copacabana. Ah. Copacabana.  All the divine young things. With all their divine big things peeking out from the divine little teeny weeny string things. I will be embarrassed later. Or at least try to act embarrassed. 

    6:05 pm | January 3, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      I think I’ll try the music.  All those Motown hits, when Mr. Wow used to dance.  And dance.  And dance!

      12:16 pm | January 4, 2011
  • Mary

    Ahhhh, Mr. Wow, you make me look like a slug of a slouch!  I took a nap Dec.31 and woke up with the discovery that the flu made it’s visit while I slept.  I don’t think I could have raised my head to read a book and I kept the tv on with no sound just so that I could look from time to time to see that the world was still revolving.  I got up at midnight and proclaimed a whispered Happy New Year and promptly slept the next 12 hours.  Sorry you have been feeling the  kleenex blues, hope they were the soft and gentle ones.

    Resolution is to have none here.  I do better if I don’t think of being locked into a plan.  I guess I am a fly by the seat of my pants gal. 

    Not much going on here in this horse and buggy town and I often feel that I could easily have been born a bear.  Hybernation would be a dream come true……….Happy New Year!  I am so glad you are here!

    6:24 pm | January 3, 2011
  • Joan Larsen

    OK, Mr. WOW, the good news first.  Once you are 60, all the viruses diminish and then almost diappear.  You will not notice for a long time — as you are too busy enjoying the “better lfe” but grab every good moment and squeeze it for all it is worth — and you can take that as naughty as you want.  Sometime — well, in the next 20 years  — you will be struck with illnesses you can’t even name — but pretend that you have the magic power to beat anything out — and probably YOU will. 

    Second, you must be up at the Cloud 9 level to be able to retain your title of Mr. Wow thru thick and thin.  Just think — none of the rest of us are called Princess Grace or Lady Gaga even, and we somehow manage.  But believe in the esteemed title given you and you alone – and for God’s sake, live up to it.  Instead of thinking so far ahead at how you are going to make the year better, don’t talk about it out loud.  In fact, don’t even think about it — as for those of us who know better, we don’t have time as we are living it and that pretty much takes 24 hours a day.  Sounds long but smiles and sighs make it go fast.  One thing leads to another and — well, Mr. WOW knows that heaven then is just around the corner. 

    Don’t list your woes.  Most of us have woes that make yours seem like baby stuff — and we walk out our doors pretending we are the female version of WOWOWOW — so much so that at times we begin to believe it — and then life gets “very interesting”.  We act like we have secrets that we just aren’t going to share which makes us so intriguing and brings desirable hangers-ons that seem to multiply — as everyone wants to hang with a good thing.

    “Depression” sounds and is deadly — but we all understand “having a bad day” or “life is hell”.  There are acceptable words and ones that sound contagious — try using clever synonyms that don’t say “stay away, I am poison”.  Even you will believe it after a while and Mr. WOW will not have that feeling of prestige and “oh, Mr. Wow has written to me” — you don’t want us to stay away in droves — you want us to cling to you thru thick and thin,.

    I guarantee what I say — grab all the goodies I have sent and see me in two weeks.  How about trying to find a hot hour in the next 24 as a start??  Or – at the very least – make “someone’s” life pointing in an upward direction and go from there.  Heaven’s just a feel away.

    Or had you forgotten????

    7:20 pm | January 3, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear Joan…beleive me, I hadn’t forgotten.  Nor am I ever blind to the many wonderful things I have in this old life.  But depression can strip every positive emotion.
      But, I’m in there pitching.
      60?  I can’t wait, kind of.  I do love those big round-number birthday parties.
       

      12:29 pm | January 4, 2011
  • OH, and Mr. Wow – Happy Birthday next week, and many happy returns!

    7:54 pm | January 3, 2011
  • CYNTHIA NEIL

    Dear Mr.Wow,
    A couple of thoughts from someone knee deep in creating my second act based on my original  dreams.  Of course we can, we must give our passion a fair shot, since we have learned the important lessons.  In your case I presume it is the one about health, in my case it is do not let anyone’s words distract me from my songs.
    As often happens the person I trusted to tell me the truth because they loved me, lied to get what he thought he wanted.  After meeting me singing my songs in NYC, the love of my  life swore he understood who I was and what I needed.   After 20 years of marriage and patient waiting for him to come back and keep his promise to help me reignite MY dreams he confessed that he believed that once I married him I would “give up all that nonsense.” A singer  without her songs is a dying soul.   Built like a refrigerator box, badly broken from fighting lyme disease on my own, i  thought my life was over.
    When my husband died he left me enough money to either believe in myself and fight for it or roll over and die.   One baby step at a time, first my health, then my voice, and finally my weight.  (That is my last challenge)  My dear pianist genius, asked me to send him my song list this week and said he would try to build me a logical cabaret show.  (We have 50 songs after 3 years of VERY hard work)  Voice teacher, boxing  lessons and hope.
    But  my great aunt lived to be 101, did I really want to quit life when I am barely half way there? No.  Might I be wasting my time?  Could be.   But where there is life there must be hope.
    My suggestion to you, let your resolution be to find one thing which makes you laugh every day.   Commit to that.  Just one laugh.   But every single day.   That is a baby step you will find challenging, given what I read.    But you can do it.  You have already come so far.
    Happy New Year,
    C

    8:04 pm | January 3, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear Cynthia…I do get a big laugh every day.  I come to this site and see my words under the moniker, “Mr. Wow.”   As I have always considered myself  Mr. Not-So-Wow, this is very amusing.   And quite satisfying, too. 
      Happy New Year!

      12:33 pm | January 4, 2011
  • macwoof woof

    hope you feel better soon. it has been good to get to know you in 2010 and I look forward to reading more in the coming year.

    11:29 pm | January 3, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear mac (okay to abreiviate?)  (I know I spelled that wrong!)

      Thank you very much.  I hope to read more myself.  I still have a stack next to my bed I haven’t touched.  Including  the Henry James novel “Portarit of a Lady” which I’ve wanted to read ever since I saw the Nicole Kidman movie version.

      Happy New Year.

      12:43 pm | January 4, 2011
  • Dianne Lopp

    Glad you’re back, Mr. Wow.  I couldn’t agree with you more about Michael Vick—I think it’s horrible that he did what he did but he paid his debt—-and I for one am not about to cast the first stone (and no, I’ve never abused an animal!); let him redeem himself by being a productive member of society—isn’t that one of the purposes of prison?  That he has come out of the experience seemingly a better person, moreover, one who is gainfully employed and excelling says something in his favor.  You mention the royals; were you too sick to see The King’s Speech?  The royal family is portrayed with somewhat rose colored glasses but Colin Firth’s performance is stunning—and worth the price of admission.  Much love and good health and happiness to you—and thank you for your New Year’s wishes.

    11:47 pm | January 3, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear Dianne: Lucky Mr. Wow–I saw “The King’s Speech” at an early screening. Before I was brought low by this cold.  Loved it.  Don’t care if it is romanticized.  It’s a movie.  And quite a spectacular one at that.

      Happt New Year!

      1:56 pm | January 4, 2011
  • rick gould

    Mr. wOw…
    Isn’t it funny what we consume for entertainment when we’re sick?
    I remember having a horrible case of the flu and curled up under blankets one frigid February.
    And I watched David Lynch’s “Muholland Drive” and Madonna’s “Swept Away” back to back. My feverish flu turned these two bizarro flicks into an acid trip!
    Celebrity culture continues to devolve…I laughed only weakly when I read of Ashton Kutcher’s latest endeavor… just seeing him in those watch commercials makes one wanna clock him!
    Yes, Rupert we know Aniston’s career grinding out generic chick flicks is built on “Friends” and Brad Pitt leaving her pitty party.
    So you wanna start a resolution?
    I can’t wait to read about them this 2011.
    I am a punster today ;)
    Get better, be well!
    Rick
     

    12:21 am | January 4, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear Rick…I tempt the fates here, but…I didn’t think “Swept Away” was quite as bad as critics said.  And had said, from the moment it began filming.  I thought it was kinda Lifetime movie-ish.  I found M rather appealing. 

      It was certainly better than “The Next Best Thing” which plumbed the depths.  M was NOT appealing in that.

      Thank you.  I am feeling somewhat recovered.   Happy New Year!

      2:05 pm | January 4, 2011
      • rick gould

        Mr. wOw–
        Here’s a thought you may enjoy: Madonna’s “Swept Away” reminded me a great deal of Elizabeth Taylor’s “Boom!”
        They both seemed to be defiantly playing tabloid versions of themselves, yelling at servants, alternating between vulgar and piss elegant, very stylized, very caricatured…all in exotic settings…both being “humbled” by penniless men… thoughts?
        I see a double feature in someone’s future!
        Look forward to reading you this year,
        Rick

        11:57 pm | January 4, 2011
  • Lizzie R.

    Mr. WOW…Great to see you back and a very Happy New year to you. Were you able to take your tree down with your ailments? Reading all you did with your cold  makes me almost want to get one, as you accomplished more during this time than I have in years. All that TV, all those books, and the movies. Maybe your cold was worth it in spite of feeling crappy.

    May this year be kind to you, and may we see you here more and more. as you are loved by the many. You bring everybody out just because of who you are. Never forget that. You have such a special way with all you say, and reveal so much of who you are to us which is why you are so endearing. Get  well, and enjoy yourself.

    12:39 am | January 4, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear Lizzie…my elaborate tree is still up.  We keep it up till my birthday, on the 7th. (Remember, I didn’t manage to hoist the fir until just before Christmas.)   Then, B. says the holidays are truly over.  (Because I’d keep the damn thing up all year and run the lights too!  Sort of like the old Russian Tea Room with its year round holiday decorations.)

      Thank you.  And a very happy New Year.

      2:25 pm | January 4, 2011
  • Bella Mia

    Zicam is the bomb.  Havent had a cold all year.  First sniffles and Zicam does its thing.

    1:12 am | January 4, 2011
  • LandofLove
    LandofLove

    “I resolve to be more thoughtful, less anxious, aware every day that life is short, and I am wasting time.” Mr. wOw, thank you for such a lovely statement. I relate so much to this, and will join you in your resolution! 

    9:40 am | January 4, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear Land…I hope  I can stick to that.  Life is so short, so precious.  And, when it’s going good–so wonderful. 

      Happy New Year!

      2:27 pm | January 4, 2011
  • anneh

    as always Mr. Wow your wit and humor never fail to brighten my day…don’t despair, life is a balance and your powerful humor and insights far outweigh any burden you think you place on those you love…trust me.  Nevertheless, your resolutions are thoughtful and deserving of effort.  Just don’t lose sight of those gifts you bring to the table that are so valued by so many.

    12:20 pm | January 4, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear anneh…

      I do place a burden on those I love.  I have to recognize that.  And I also have to accept  that those I love sometimes place a burden on me.  Because as much as I want to wallow in disapproval of myself, I’m not Satan.  Not every day, anyway. 

      Happy New Year. 

      Your name is somewhat Biblical.  I like it.

      3:31 pm | January 4, 2011
  • Charles Casillo

    Mr. Wow..please keep making us laugh and cry and think!

    4:05 pm | January 4, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear Charles…

      I think Mr. Wow encourages people to laugh.  Tho naturally I think it is at him, rather than with him.

      I need to worki on this in 2011.

      Happy New Year!

      1:52 pm | January 5, 2011
  • Daniel Sugar

    Mr. Wow
     
    There is a special light called a Day Light. Very compact – sits on your desk – really helps depression.
     
    Best for 2011
     
    Daniel

    12:11 pm | January 5, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear Mr. Sugar (sexy!)Thank you, I’ll look into that.Happy New Year.

      1:51 pm | January 5, 2011
  • Laura Campbell

    Hi Mr. WoW,

    I really enjoy your column.  You are usually saying the stuff I am thinking and it’s refreshing! 

    One of the things that struck me in your post, being a liberal-feminist, is Greta’s assesment that I am a bad mother.  To that I want to say to her, Thank you, Captain Obvious!  I don’t need her to tell me I’m a bad mother.  I am human: I lose my patience, feel tired, uncertain, and generally lack in omnipotence.  We are ALL bad mothers, not because we are liberal or conservative, but because we are human and imperfect as a species.  All we can do is love our children and make sure that they know it.  For every one thing we do “right” there are 5 things we could’ve done better, and most of the time we don’t realize we’re doing it wrong until it’s too late.  I would like to meet the Perfect Mama-Grizzly and ask her brood if they think she’s so perfect, I bet – if they were honest – they don’t think she’s perfect at all.

    I think we need to focus on building up families instead of tearing them down.  I think that if Sarah Palin and her Fox Friends had a sense of responsibility, they would focus their considerable means on helping the families and children that need it.  Sadly, children make up one of the largest populations of poor people in the US.  Why aren’t they talking about that?  Oh, right, kids don’t buy gas, kids don’t contribute to political parties, kids don’t vote; why bother helping kids?

    Sorry to rant, but I wanted to share my thoughts. Hope you are feeling better soon, colds really suck.

    Laura

    4:23 pm | January 5, 2011
    • Chip Griswold

      I am human: I lose my patience, feel tired, uncertain, and generally lack in omnipotence.  We are ALL bad mothers

      Nah.  Once kids realize that their parents are not perfect, the more perfect the parent really is.  Our mistakes are part of the learning process – both for us and our kids.
      Firm believer in the teacher who stops learning, is no longer much of a teacher.

      10:36 am | January 6, 2011
  • Andy
    Andy C

    Oh Mr. Wow, sick or not, you do make me laugh.  Aston Kutcher comment is a gem and of course the Palin makes me more than slightly afraid. 

    I wish you a happy, healthy new year full of all the good things in life.  Depression is seductive, rather comfortable like a soft old slipper….far to easy to succumb, hope you can avoid it. 

    Again, thank you for the chuckles and a good year to you and yours,

    Andy C.

    8:13 pm | January 5, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear Andy C…thank you.  I am feeling better, though I’m still coughing like Garbo in “Camille.” 

      As to being depressed, the only way I know how to get out of it, broefly, is to remind myself how good I have it in a generally bad world.  B. always says, “You don;t really need to compare your life to the world’s one hundred neediest cases, your issues have a right to exist.”  But, that’s just me.  I think of Haiti, and count my blessings.

      Yes, depression is like a comfy pair of slippers, or an over-sized robe.  It’s easy to stay that way.  Certainly I find it easier to feel guilty, accept blame and generally run myself down.  The hard part is getting dressed, mentally.  And throwing out that robe.  Maybe this year.

      10:10 am | January 6, 2011
  • Chip Griswold

    Mr. Wow,
    ” can still be the old me, but it doesn’t last long. I must remind myself that though I turn 58 next week, I am still a young man. (Certainly if I dropped dead at this computer, they’d say that: “Oh, so young!”)…

    Sorry, but these lines made me laugh out loud; co-workers looked at me weirdly.

    I, too, turn 58 this year….time flies.  Just saw a picture of myself from five years ago – last five years were big aging years, hoping the next five are more friendly: damn stress.

    Anyway, best wishes to you in the New Year.  Look forward to reading more of your columns: make me laugh, make me angry, make  me smile, make me ask questions – but always enjoy and look for the next one.

    Your friendly conservative,
    Chip

    10:14 am | January 6, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear Chip…yeah, around 50 it starts to really speed up.  That cute dimple on my right cheek is now an indentation.  I have to make sure i keep my weight up or I look haggard.  And no more pics of me in my old “handsome, brooding” mode.  The only way to look half-way decent is to keep smiling.  (People, go to your dentist.  A good smile is better than plastic surgery.  Well, if you’re man, anyway.)

      Thanks for your good wishes.  The same to you.  I love my conservative friends.  Even when they are not so friendly.  It’s invigorating.

      9:02 pm | January 6, 2011
  • Lourdes Villarreal

    Mr. Wow, your list of resolutions hit a nerve on me (or is it ‘in me’? Sorry, my English), and it hit hard. Struggling at 46 with my own health issues and the very unpleasant symptoms (anxiety, depression, weight gain), not having a romantic relationship in over a year (and not one in sight), and in deep financial troubles, this is the only year in my life in which I am actually having real resolutions. I really need to get my act together, to focus on the many positive aspects in my life, to look forward to a bright future (instead of thinking about it with hopelessness and fear), and all in all, trying to change just a little bit the autodestructive ‘thing’ inside me that prevents me from having a good time and being the funny, enthusiastic, charming woman I used to be. I so relate to what you say: “In still being young (ish) there can be a second act in my life. Especially as I don’t think the curtain ever really came up on the first act.”
    I wish all the best for you, your family and Mr. B on 2011, and hope you keep up with the great job, since your writings are one of the things that make my mornings bearable! :)
     
    On the lighter notes, I can only comment that I don’t understand how Jennifer Aniston hasn’t been able to bring the charm she used to display on “Friends” (one of my all-time favs) into her movie characters. ‘Rachel’ would make me laugh so hard, as she would look and act so naturally, yet on her movies her acting seem so flat and boring… The only movie I really liked was “Me and Marley”. I thought it would be yet another disappointment, but it turned out to be a very entertaining and moving ‘dramedy’, which is ironic since I’m not much of a dog person (though I would never come to the M. Vick’s extremes) ;-)

    2:12 pm | January 6, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear Lourdes…oh, the worst part is remembering yourself as you once were.  Even though we always say, “I can’t remeber being any other way.”  Really? Really?!

      I send you all my good thoughts.  As many as I can spare. 

      As for Miss Aniston, she is charming but needs a makeover.  At the very least cut off five inches of that hair.  And get a new agent.  I don’t begrudge her working, despite the results most of the time.  I am exasperated by her wasting what I think is a genuine talent.  Now in her forties, she must stop and think.

      9:09 pm | January 6, 2011
  • Belinda Joy

    Happy New Year Mr. Wow! I hope this year proves to be healthy, prosperous and all that you desire.

    4:37 pm | January 6, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear Belinda…excuse me for the profanity but, Good Fucking Grief!  Where have you been?   I hadn’t seen you here or on other posts in what seems like ages (i don’t flatter myself that you feel the need to comment always on Mr. Wow)

      Happy New Year to you, honey.

      Don’t be a stranger.

      8:32 pm | January 6, 2011
      • Baby Snooks

        Tsk, tsk.  Good F***King Grief indeed. 

        5:03 am | January 7, 2011
        • Mr. Wow

          Dear  Baby–I take my vocabulary from the lips of my fave living star–Miss Elizabeth Taylor. (I know you are off her because of recent events.)

          However, I apologize for having offended you.

          XXXXMr. Wow

          1:36 pm | January 11, 2011
      • Belinda Joy

        *SMILE* You always have a way of making me laugh! That’s my Mr. Wow…..
         
        I’ve just been really busy, still am. But I will continue to stop by and visit from time to time.  Have a good weekend.

        9:41 am | January 7, 2011
  • Daniel Sugar

    (When Ashton and Demi use the term “End Of Times” they’re referring to the disappearance of all plastic surgeons.)

    7:22 pm | January 6, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      DEar Daniel…Excellent!

      11:07 pm | January 6, 2011
  • Harriet Shoebridge

    Dear Mr. Wow … before I forget … midddle age if I live past one hundred and who wants that … pass the vitamin B12 please … anyhow … rebooting ye ol’ IBM … Happy New Year, to you.  My resolution … to love myself more, be kinder to myself … sounds a tad precious but not … not really.  Be kinder to me?  Is this too much to ask? … of me?  A book to not read, passing this on, Keith Richards, Life.  The life of the privileged, a lifelong drug user whose privilege has kept him out of jails.  Really, just how much is one expected to read of drugs and drugs and drugs without asking one’s self … and why did I buy this book?  As for the Ashton Kutcher thing, well, kinder to me includes not allowing myself to lapse into third gear bitchiness … and truly … he’s just too easy a target … oops … was that bitchy?  I resolve, I resolve … blah, blah, blah.  All the best.   

    4:44 am | January 7, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear Harriet…I’d like to be kinder to myself too!  It’s not too much to ask.  In fact, it’s vital.
       
      Happy New Year.

      3:07 pm | January 10, 2011
  • Kate Arnott-Hawkins

    Happy New Year Mr. WOW.  My resolution is simple. Try to stay healthy and on my feet for another year.
    I enjoy your writing.  You think like a woman and I enjoy that.  Not that women do not think as men because they do.  We all just don’t realize how similar our thinking is whether man or woman.
    I particularly enjoy your appreciation of TCM. Personally those movies are very comforting to me. But they take you out of your present reality and in most cases bring good feelings. At least they do when I look at them.
    As for the Royalty of Europe. They are always interesting if not admired.  Talk about the Borgias.  Someone should write a movie or play about the terrible hemophelia problems that caused terrible damage to the Royals in the 1920′s and “30s. Not until they started marrying out of the cousin generations did the survival rate of the young royals start rising.
    Keep on writing. Get well from your cold

    1:08 pm | January 7, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear Kate…Hmmmm…perhaps I think like a woman.  Perhaps I’m just gay as a goose.  Perhaps there’s really no difference in how we think.

      I do know that I like and admire women.  I admire all who fight the good fight, sometimes lose, often win, never give up.  I admire those who respect themselves.  I don’t think I could connect successfully with 25 year old women who have been raised in the MTV/reality TV culture of female debasement. (Not that this culture is confined to women. Or clueless young staright men.   Now, even gays have their own ghastly reality shows, reflecting the worst in human nature.)

      Happy New Year!  I’m feeling better but not 100%.  Frustrating.

      11:03 am | January 9, 2011
  • LuckyLady n/a

    The holidays must have been miserable for you.  It occurred to me how  you can turn your funky feelings around.  STOP WATCHING FOX NEWS!  I am 77 years old and love my life.  Look around–there is always somebody with a dimple who soon will get an indentation worse than yours.

    9:13 pm | January 7, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear LL…my holidays were…well, I had a cold.  Millions of others should be so lucky that that is their big issue over the holidays–or any day!

      As for Fox News, I can’t stop watching.  JUst as I can;t stop watching CNN or MSNBC or BBC or the news on PBS.  But I balance that with movies (good and bad) and reading (literature and trash)

      Ah, my indentation.  We all have our little vanity concerns.  Happy New Year!

      10:48 am | January 9, 2011
  • katywonLA

    Glad you are better. Keep on writing and looking on the bright side. Your picture on the site looks like one I have seen of Julie Andrews(one of my favorites). I meant no disrespect to you, in fact its a compliment in my view to think like a woman.  Men may think like the opposite sex but it’s still hard in this day and age to be your real self. As for the Gay aspect it never occurred to me.
    My favorite dislike on TV is when the idiotic women comedians and actresses brag about “Their Gays!”. It turns me off. Gays are not to be collected as pets and used for personal aggrandizement.  I understand it does not matter what I think.  Thanks for responding to my original post.

    6:39 pm | January 9, 2011
  • Dan S.

    My hand has sort of been forced in making 2011 a better year when it comes to wrestling depression. When left to my own devices, my default use of free time it to sit alone somewhere, preferably in the dark, preferably with music playing, and preferably with a drink in my hand that’s as strong as it is bitter; booze, an old friend.

    But I did something different at the end of December when bought my first house. Depression being what it is, I can’t truely count the blessings that put me in a position to be able to buy a house in a time when so many people are having theirs snatched away by financial institutions. I can’t pat myself on the back for the amazing price at which I bought it. But it’s a work in progress; a chore that, in one way or another, keeps me busy whether I like it or not. I haven’t fully moved into it just yet since I’ve been making repairs to it, but so much of my focus has been on paint colors and leaky faucets and carpets and appliances and there’s a certain satisfaction to be found in it all – a satisfaction that I wouldn’t otherwise find in my natural sedentary compulsion.

    This weekend, my family, who have better faculties to appreciate my home purchase, came to help me paint the place. By late afternoon, the labor had worn them out, so I thanked them and they left, but I opted to keep working. I must have been completely focused on my work because, before I realized it, I was squinting in the last of the day’s failing light. I decided to take a break, so I turned up the radio and went about making myself a sandwich from the ham, mustard, and bread that my mom had so kindly left there for me. With sandwich in hand, I sat on the stairs – no chairs there to speak of – and as night completely took over, Patsy Cline’s Crazy came on the radio. Here I was, sitting alone in the dark with music playing and it was the first time ever where I did so and felt a warm feeling that I want to call contentment.
    And the thought occurred to me – I’ve been boozing up this whole time and I just needed a ham sandwich.
    I hope you’ll have a wonderful 2011, Mr. Wow.

    9:29 am | January 11, 2011
    • Mr. Wow

      Dear Dan…ah, yes.  Booze is an old friend of Mr. Wow’s too.  And pleasant as it is to drink, one must be aware that liquor is a depressant. It is only a temporary respite. 

      A ham sandwich and Patsy Cline are a better bet.  Or, a good anti-depressant.  I’ve had iffy results, but I do know they can be miracle workers for some. 

      Happy New Year!

      11:22 am | January 11, 2011
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