When the Donald backed out of the presidential race, Mr. wOw found himself strangely … disappointed
My heart was heavy when I learned earlier today that Donald Trump had decided not to run for president.
Oh, no. Not that I supported the bloated toad. But it was difficult, even for the super cynical Mr. wOw, to accept that it was, as almost everyone had said — a publicity stunt. The lowest level, ugliest publicity stunt ever.
Perhaps, in forcing President’s Obama’s hand in the matter of “The Birth Certificate,” it was a stunt not without some merit. I wish Obama hadn’t blinked. Others say fine, at least it’s done and over. (Yeah, let’s wait till the campaign really starts have it dragged out again!)
No, I was kind of hoping Trump was at least a man — despite his pathetically thin-skinned appearance the White House Correspondent’s Dinner, where he was ripped a new one by Obama and Seth Meyers. A real man who backed up his talk with some action. A man who — though his “policies ” make me throw up — has the courage of his convictions, and the willingness to spend his vaunted billions to help America.
Now, Newt Gingrich scares the crap out of me, but he is a man. He’s jumped in, with all his wives and affairs and flip-flopping and outrageous sentiments and hypocrisy — but he’s done it. Newt is running for president. And he can be impressive at times. He’s not an idiot. Do not laugh him off.
I hope Newt doesn’t win. But if I was offered the opportunity to shake the hand of Newt or Donald, Mr. Gingrich and I would be sharing a manly hand-clasping. Though he’d be giving the evil eye to as fey a fellow as Mr. wOw!
I’d claim an injury or give myself an injury on the spot to get out of showing that old Greek or Roman or Elizabethan Age gesture of respect to Trump. (Historical accounts vary on when or where the handshake originated. Some say as far back as the comb-over.)
Then again, Donald is a germaphobe and doesn’t like human contact anyway. Perhaps that’s the reason he backed out. If humans got too close to him they’d figure it out: Pancake makeup, tortured hair and a perpetual pout. Has anybody ever seen Charo and Donald in the same room?